Sometimes it’s really hard for me to look back and see how my life was “before” and now what it’s like at the present.
The one example I’ll give is what I’m missing most lately. My hobbies. Especially gardening.
Summer, not too long ago, meant a huge garden, harvesting, up keeping the garden, preserving what I picked and sharing the bounty. My fruit trees were in a cycle and my Satsuma plums would be coming in right now. The kids would be collecting 4 eggs a day, one for each chicken, and we would be giving them to neighbors and family. I would be preserving surplus fruit and vegetables like crazy.
My old garden. It makes me cry to think that I will probably never have a garden like this again. I had raised beds in the front and back yard. And about a dozen fruit trees/vines scattered throughout the very small (7,000 sq ft) urban property.
I was able to jam this year, due to the kindness of one of my swimmers, who brought me a box of his plums. Another couple, also part of my masters team, brought me plums too, which I made chutney from. So I got a little canning fix. Nothing like in the past.
And I really miss this:
Those fresh, sweet heirloom tomatoes. Those unique varieties, which I babied from seed.
I actually broke down and cried a couple weeks ago, when I was returning from the community garden near my office. They sell their harvest every Friday. It just made me so sad for my old garden. And the chickens. Parts of my old life. Things I probably won’t ever experience again – I’ll never be able to own property around here like that again.
I have to try to remember the good and live in what’s better in my present.