So much to say, so little to write

Well I think I took an unexpected break from writing.  I’m not sure why.  I can say it’s because I started a new job in October.  Or I can say that because my job involves writing full time I had no extra words to type out.  I’m not sure why.  But what I can say is:

  • I’m still not divorced and STBX is still an ass and makes my life difficult even when I don’t see him.  He at least finally has a job and will have to pay child support (let’s hope).
  • My kids each got older
  • The holidays were hard
  • I had a meltdown over the holidays.  Because my kids told me how the tree was decorated at STBX’s with MY ornaments (from my mom – over 35  yrs. worth).
  • I rarely sew.  I have no fabric (STBX still is hiding it all) and I have no money to buy any.
  • I am not motivated to work out.  I am probably at half of what I was doing in the summer.  Therefore I feel icky.
  • STBX STILL is not taking the kids swimming.  Even though there is a court order that he has too.
  • The only “perk” of being a single mom was the fact that I make so little money my kids can go to resident camp on scholarship.  Plus I get a staff discount.  So I can almost afford it.
  • My job is boring.  And I still feel upset with the “system” that I was forced to take something I didn’t want in a field I don’t want to be in until I retire.
  • My job has kept me from being truly depressed.  I *have* to get up in the morning and I am not working from home isolated.
  • I’m still completely in love with the LOML.  He is my soulmate.  He gave me a card for Valentine’s Day.  A card with meaning.  A card with a personal note written in it.

Hopefully 2016 will bring change.  In a positive way.

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